The Effects of Drugs on a Person's Life

[Guest]

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[WFShaun]

I've talked about this topic before a little while back but I started thinking heavily about it again last night after watching Real World.  Whether you watch the show doesn't matter.  TV show or not what will be said/shown in this thread is real.  Some of you know that some of the closest people to me have had issues with drugs, in many cases, major issues.  That drug use, although none of them are still users, still effect each of them to this day in different ways.  The reason last night's Real World episode got me thinking very hard about it all is because of one point that Joey, one of the characters brought up in a goodbye letter he wrote.  Last night was his last episode because of the issues he still has with drug and alcohol addiction.  Joey was addicted to cocaine and alcohol for years and attempted to quit just before he came on the show.  The lifestyle in L.A. was too much for his urges and he dropped right back into it again.  One episode, although unknown by the house-mates, Joey snorted cocaine and drank a looooooot of alcohol.  That night he just went crazy crazy nuts in the house and the MTV producers offered him an opportunity to go to rehab which he took.  He spent 30 days in and when he came back to the house the urges came back so he chose to leave the house, which is what led to what I will post below. 

As some of you know, I'm an outspoken person and I am a very proud person.  But, I'm an emotional person in many ways.  I love to analyze things, find solutions for problems, and believe it or not, help people.  The video I will post of his letter had me in tears last night, had me in tears when I watched it again today after work, and does right now for many reasons.  I think about Joey as well as my family and friends who have been through the same thing.  All of what Joey has been through in his letter, my closest family members have been through.  People are often told of what happens during drug use and a little of how you are effected after drug use.  I didn't realize how deeply and seriously a person is effected long-term after drug use until this episode.  I talked to my closest family member today about this letter and he agreed that he has been effected the same way.  I'll talk more about it after the vid.  I warn you, this **** well may make you cry but watch it before reading further if you don't mind...............

http://www.realworlddailies.com/Video/Joeys-goodbye-letter/092ECFFFF00A1312F00170099A730

The point that caught me off guard a little was the fact that drugs killed his self esteem.  You saw the guy, he's very built, a good looking guy, and from the outside you would think the guy has nothing to dislike about himself.  My closest family member was the EXACT same before drug use.  Girls hit on him, he had tons of friends, he would talk to anyone that was around him.  I envied that about him.  Now, he barely leaves the house, gets nervous at times when he has to talk to people, doesn't even attempt to talk to girls, and questions everything he does because he feels something must be wrong.  Neither Joey nor my family member has any reason to feel the way they do, none.  But drug use has brought them down and my family member has been clean for three years.  I don't know if anyone has ever analyzed how much of a problem low self esteem is for a person but it literally effects everything you do, everything. 

This brings me to what will probably be sort of a rambling conclusion.  Drug use isn't A problem in this country, it is the BIGGEST problem in this country.  Sure, terrorism is a problem but if you really sit down and read up on the drug business, drug cartels, the effects of drugs on our citizens, talk to police officers about how huge drug use is among children in this country, or if you have been around a lot of high school aged children within the last decade you will really get a true feel for how drugs effect our children, adult citizens, their futures, our country now, and our country's future.  I'm telling each and every one of you right now, it is the single BIGGEST problem in our nation and it is only getting worse.  Pay attention to your children, talk to your children, pay attention to your children's friends, meet their parents, read up on how drug users act and pay attention to how your children act.  If one of your children tries drugs ONCE, just ONCE, chances are it will either ruin their life or effect them in a very bad way for the rest of their life.

[cottonwood]

This brings me to what will probably be sort of a rambling conclusion.  Drug use isn't A problem in this country, it is the BIGGEST problem in this country. 

I have often thought that if you wanted to undermine this country, the best way to do it would be to import potent, cheap drugs.  It would be a much better way than guns and bombs to defeat America.  Kind of sickening, isn't it?  Especially considering that we don't have a real good handle on how extensive drug use really is in this country.

Angie

[dkpatton]

Alcohol stole my childhood.  My father was an alcoholic.  I lost a good 2 decades of my life to alcohol and drug use and my single biggest fear is that it will get a grip on one of my children.  I try to be very honest with my kids about what it can do to your life.  My oldest got to see a lot of it first hand.  It is one of the reason I am soo proud of the young lady she has become.  I agree that it is THE biggest problem facing America.  When I hear the religious right raging about abortion and talking about gay marriage being a threat to the American family, I just want to scream.  THIS IS THE BIGGEST THREAT TO THE AMERICAN FAMILY and the spiral continues!!!  That is why I would like to see more focus on making treatment available.  Three years clean is a wonderful accomplishment for your family member!  That is just a little more than I have.  I thank God every day that I don't battle those demons anymore!  Not everyone walks away!

[WFShaun]

Cottonwood, I agree.  It would definitely be the best way to bring this country down if that was the goal.  What's interesting is I don't think that is the drug cartel's goal.  They are just in it for the money.  But, they are killing two birds with one stone, no pun intended.

[WFShaun]

Alcohol stole my childhood.  My father was an alcoholic.  I lost a good 2 decades of my life to alcohol and drug use and my single biggest fear is that it will get a grip on one of my children.  I try to be very honest with my kids about what it can do to your life.  My oldest got to see a lot of it first hand.  It is one of the reason I am soo proud of the young lady she has become.  I agree that it is THE biggest problem facing America.  When I hear the religious right raging about abortion and talking about gay marriage being a threat to the American family, I just want to scream.  THIS IS THE BIGGEST THREAT TO THE AMERICAN FAMILY and the spiral continues!!!  That is why I would like to see more focus on making treatment available.  Three years clean is a wonderful accomplishment for your family member!  That is just a little more than I have.  I thank God every day that I don't battle those demons anymore!  Not everyone walks away!

Ugh, I meant to reply to dkpatton in the above reply as well but I hit the submit button too friggin fast.

dk, it's very good to hear that you have been clean for so long.  addictions such as these not only destroy the lives of the addicted but of the closest people around them as well.  It's good to hear you mention the government's lack of initiative to provide treatment facilities for the addicted.  I feel that this is a problem as well as the lack of drug education in schools these days.  I feel that the drug education I had in school as well as McGruff and the Just Say No campaigns were to my benefit while in school.  It planted a seed hat I remembered for the rest of my life and I have never tried one drug in my life.  I've never even considered smoking pot.  But, as I grew up through the public school system in the 90s drug education lessened drastically.  I don't see hardly any commercials on TV any longer, no signs around town, or bumper stickers on cars.  I've thought long and hard for years about what type of charity I would start if I were to start making decent money in life.  and for a few months now a drug education program has been bouncing around in my head.  I've decided for sure now that a drug education program, conducted a little differently maybe than traditional programs of the past, is what I want to do.  I hope to create the program, get the approval of the Texas education system, and possibly spread it nationwide.  I think it should start with education in our schools and with our parents and that's my next project.

[Josh]

Working on a blog post, so I haven't been able to read this entire thread yet, but there's a post going up on the blog shortly that's related to this topic, randomly enough...you'll be interested in it, I think, WFShaun.

[dkpatton]

Alcohol stole my childhood.  My father was an alcoholic.  I lost a good 2 decades of my life to alcohol and drug use and my single biggest fear is that it will get a grip on one of my children.  I try to be very honest with my kids about what it can do to your life.  My oldest got to see a lot of it first hand.  It is one of the reason I am soo proud of the young lady she has become.  I agree that it is THE biggest problem facing America.  When I hear the religious right raging about abortion and talking about gay marriage being a threat to the American family, I just want to scream.  THIS IS THE BIGGEST THREAT TO THE AMERICAN FAMILY and the spiral continues!!!  That is why I would like to see more focus on making treatment available.  Three years clean is a wonderful accomplishment for your family member!  That is just a little more than I have.  I thank God every day that I don't battle those demons anymore!  Not everyone walks away!

Ugh, I meant to reply to dkpatton in the above reply as well but I hit the submit button too friggin fast.

dk, it's very good to hear that you have been clean for so long.  addictions such as these not only destroy the lives of the addicted but of the closest people around them as well.  It's good to hear you mention the government's lack of initiative to provide treatment facilities for the addicted.  I feel that this is a problem as well as the lack of drug education in schools these days.  I feel that the drug education I had in school as well as McGruff and the Just Say No campaigns were to my benefit while in school.  It planted a seed hat I remembered for the rest of my life and I have never tried one drug in my life.  I've never even considered smoking pot.  But, as I grew up through the public school system in the 90s drug education lessened drastically.  I don't see hardly any commercials on TV any longer, no signs around town, or bumper stickers on cars.  I've thought long and hard for years about what type of charity I would start if I were to start making decent money in life.  and for a few months now a drug education program has been bouncing around in my head.  I've decided for sure now that a drug education program, conducted a little differently maybe than traditional programs of the past, is what I want to do.  I hope to create the program, get the approval of the Texas education system, and possibly spread it nationwide.  I think it should start with education in our schools and with our parents and that's my next project.

I have also thought that mentorship programs would be so beneficial.  So many kids are growing up in single parent homes.  One of the future hopes of H2H is to start a mentorship program for teenage boys.  My husband is an avid outdoorsman and a lot of young men don't have dads to do those kinds of things with.  He would love to take some young men and teach them the rich traditions and values involved in hunting and shooting sports.  Also, while "religion" has made it difficult. I think the right approach to teaching kids about God and the freedom they can achieve through Christ would change the world.  I try not to let all of my posts get "preachy" but finding God in the place and the people that I found Him changed my life in ways I never dared to hope for and all of the things that I thought I had inherited through my family (call it genetics or generational curses) stop here...dead in their tracks.  And when you do get that charity started, please count me honored to volunteer!

[WFShaun]

Working on a blog post, so I haven't been able to read this entire thread yet, but there's a post going up on the blog shortly that's related to this topic, randomly enough...you'll be interested in it, I think, WFShaun.

I will definitely be checking it out!

[WFShaun]

Alcohol stole my childhood.  My father was an alcoholic.  I lost a good 2 decades of my life to alcohol and drug use and my single biggest fear is that it will get a grip on one of my children.  I try to be very honest with my kids about what it can do to your life.  My oldest got to see a lot of it first hand.  It is one of the reason I am soo proud of the young lady she has become.  I agree that it is THE biggest problem facing America.  When I hear the religious right raging about abortion and talking about gay marriage being a threat to the American family, I just want to scream.  THIS IS THE BIGGEST THREAT TO THE AMERICAN FAMILY and the spiral continues!!!  That is why I would like to see more focus on making treatment available.  Three years clean is a wonderful accomplishment for your family member!  That is just a little more than I have.  I thank God every day that I don't battle those demons anymore!  Not everyone walks away!

Ugh, I meant to reply to dkpatton in the above reply as well but I hit the submit button too friggin fast.

dk, it's very good to hear that you have been clean for so long.  addictions such as these not only destroy the lives of the addicted but of the closest people around them as well.  It's good to hear you mention the government's lack of initiative to provide treatment facilities for the addicted.  I feel that this is a problem as well as the lack of drug education in schools these days.  I feel that the drug education I had in school as well as McGruff and the Just Say No campaigns were to my benefit while in school.  It planted a seed hat I remembered for the rest of my life and I have never tried one drug in my life.  I've never even considered smoking pot.  But, as I grew up through the public school system in the 90s drug education lessened drastically.  I don't see hardly any commercials on TV any longer, no signs around town, or bumper stickers on cars.  I've thought long and hard for years about what type of charity I would start if I were to start making decent money in life.  and for a few months now a drug education program has been bouncing around in my head.  I've decided for sure now that a drug education program, conducted a little differently maybe than traditional programs of the past, is what I want to do.  I hope to create the program, get the approval of the Texas education system, and possibly spread it nationwide.  I think it should start with education in our schools and with our parents and that's my next project.

I have also thought that mentorship programs would be so beneficial.  So many kids are growing up in single parent homes.  One of the future hopes of H2H is to start a mentorship program for teenage boys.  My husband is an avid outdoorsman and a lot of young men don't have dads to do those kinds of things with.  He would love to take some young men and teach them the rich traditions and values involved in hunting and shooting sports.  Also, while "religion" has made it difficult. I think the right approach to teaching kids about God and the freedom they can achieve through Christ would change the world.  I try not to let all of my posts get "preachy" but finding God in the place and the people that I found Him changed my life in ways I never dared to hope for and all of the things that I thought I had inherited through my family (call it genetics or generational curses) stop here...dead in their tracks.  And when you do get that charity started, please count me honored to volunteer!

I agree with you.  The program I want to start really has to hit home though.  It can't be the typical preaching that everyone hears.  It has to be something that everyone can relate to.  I definitely want to hopefully include guest speakers and would like to talk to those who have been addicted to a drug of some type to get inside their heads and hear about their lives so I can really get a feel for everything.  When it gets to that point I would love your help dk.

[Pookie]

Alcohol stole my childhood.  My father was an alcoholic.  I lost a good 2 decades of my life to alcohol and drug use and my single biggest fear is that it will get a grip on one of my children.  I try to be very honest with my kids about what it can do to your life.  My oldest got to see a lot of it first hand.  It is one of the reason I am soo proud of the young lady she has become.  I agree that it is THE biggest problem facing America.  When I hear the religious right raging about abortion and talking about gay marriage being a threat to the American family, I just want to scream.  THIS IS THE BIGGEST THREAT TO THE AMERICAN FAMILY and the spiral continues!!!  That is why I would like to see more focus on making treatment available.  Three years clean is a wonderful accomplishment for your family member!  That is just a little more than I have.  I thank God every day that I don't battle those demons anymore!  Not everyone walks away!

Ugh, I meant to reply to dkpatton in the above reply as well but I hit the submit button too friggin fast.

dk, it's very good to hear that you have been clean for so long.  addictions such as these not only destroy the lives of the addicted but of the closest people around them as well.  It's good to hear you mention the government's lack of initiative to provide treatment facilities for the addicted.  I feel that this is a problem as well as the lack of drug education in schools these days.  I feel that the drug education I had in school as well as McGruff and the Just Say No campaigns were to my benefit while in school.  It planted a seed hat I remembered for the rest of my life and I have never tried one drug in my life.  I've never even considered smoking pot.  But, as I grew up through the public school system in the 90s drug education lessened drastically.  I don't see hardly any commercials on TV any longer, no signs around town, or bumper stickers on cars.  I've thought long and hard for years about what type of charity I would start if I were to start making decent money in life.  and for a few months now a drug education program has been bouncing around in my head.  I've decided for sure now that a drug education program, conducted a little differently maybe than traditional programs of the past, is what I want to do.  I hope to create the program, get the approval of the Texas education system, and possibly spread it nationwide.  I think it should start with education in our schools and with our parents and that's my next project.

Shaun, CONGRATS TO YOU and ME!!!!!!
For NEVER trying any type of drug!!
I too was raised up with the SAY NO TO DRUGS program in school, and McGruff the dog. I'm sure they helped my decisions as well. I was brought up in a single parent home, it was just my mom and I. And I found my best friend when I was in the 3rd grade. I lived at her house, as she lived at mine. Her parents, were my parents. Her dad, I claimed as my own...and they actually called me 'nother daughter'. I am for CERTAIN, that her parents and grandparents help guide me through my childhood.
I'm really not sure how I made it through my childhood without trying drugs though. Most of my entire family does or has done drugs, and did them right in front of me. I remember watching my uncle and his 'friend' (I use the term friend very losely) bag up pot to sale. I remember going to the lake with my aunt and her girl 'friends' and her friend's lil brother offering me a puff....I declined and said I didn't do that stuff! I wasn't afraid...the peer pressure didn't bother me. It was at that very moment, that I began mothering and protecting children. I took the lil kids away from them and we went to play, I was 10/11 years old. I KNEW it was wrong, and I just didn't want any part of it! To this day, I'm not sure of one male in my family that doesn't do drugs. HOW SAD IS THAT?!?! And for this reason, since I had my first baby...I've not had much to do with my family. I don't want my kids around such environment. Drugs ARE my BIGGEST FEAR as a parent! I'll tell you right now it is! I want to do everything in my power to instill in my kids that they CAN and WILL say NO TO DRUGS! I want them to have the self-esteem it takes to JUST SAY NO!!! It doesn't matter what the other kids are doing, it matters what's right and what's wrong! They aren't TRUE friends if they try to get you to do bad things!!

Shaun, if you ever start up this Drug Educational Program in which you speak....I'd give my right arm to assist any ANY and ALL ways possible.

[Pookie]

Alcohol stole my childhood.  My father was an alcoholic.  I lost a good 2 decades of my life to alcohol and drug use and my single biggest fear is that it will get a grip on one of my children.  I try to be very honest with my kids about what it can do to your life.  My oldest got to see a lot of it first hand.  It is one of the reason I am soo proud of the young lady she has become.  I agree that it is THE biggest problem facing America.  When I hear the religious right raging about abortion and talking about gay marriage being a threat to the American family, I just want to scream.  THIS IS THE BIGGEST THREAT TO THE AMERICAN FAMILY and the spiral continues!!!  That is why I would like to see more focus on making treatment available.  Three years clean is a wonderful accomplishment for your family member!  That is just a little more than I have.  I thank God every day that I don't battle those demons anymore!  Not everyone walks away!

CONGRATS to you in your MAJOR accomplishment!!! Life is to short to waste on drugs and alcohol!! And now, with what sounds to be a wonderful husband and your children, you have so much to be grateful and thankful for!

 
Raising my cup of joe to dkpatton!!!!

[tntnhbaby]

Its funny, I have never tried a drug in my life but my life has been greatly impacted by drugs.  My half sister is only 15 but her mother did cocaine when she was pregnant with her.  As a result she was born with a congenitial heart defect and has had 6 major heart surgeries in her short life.  She has died on the table 3 times leaving her with brain damage.  She will essentially be 6 yrs old her whole life.

My step-son is also suffering right now because his mother has chosen drugs over him.  She will call him and promise him the moon and then we have to pick up the pieces when she doesn't deliver.  She was supposed to get him for the summer.....called him and told him, yea son I will have your plane ticket ready as soon as you get out of school.  Well now she won't even call him or answer when he calls her.  She is avoiding him, and he is sooo hopeful.
Everyday he says "ell I will probably be gone tomorrow next week, I won't be here much longer".  What am I supposed to tell the kid?  I just agree with him and assure him his mom will call him soon.

I am sorry, I know I am spilling my guts here but it just aggrivates me!!!  Sometimes it is good to just gripe and let it all out, even if it is to total strangers!!! LOL!

[cottonwood]

Our adopted son had the same problem --- a crack user for a mother.  Talk about the effects on his life --- he will NEVER have a level playing field.

Angie

[Busy Mom]

Shaun - you should be in my sociology class this week.  The focus is on drugs and the effects it has on society as a whole.  You'd be quite interested in it.  As for wanting to start a program...GOOD FOR YOU.  I just kept pushing and asking and wouldn't quit and now I'm involved with some really great people who are willing to help me educated kids and parent about child sexual abuse and how prevalent it is in our society.

I encourage you to keep going.  It is a lot of hard work and at time you will think no one cares and want to give up....DON'T!!  I know I feel that way often and when I post certain things on here and no one responds...it makes me feel as though some people just don't want to talk about it.

But, as you stated, it has to be talked about.  It MUST be talked about.  Keep pushing forward...you will succeed and I have no doubt you will reach someone.

I've always said...we don't do it for the masses...we do it for the few.  With every few we can reach it will make our world that much better.

Kuddos to you and let me know if you need anything.  I have tons of research and possibly some ideas of who you can get in contact with you may be able to help you get a program going.

I'm still working so hard on mine and have gotten very little response...but I'm not giving up...for the kids' sake!!  I know you won't give up either!

[Pookie]

Its funny, I have never tried a drug in my life but my life has been greatly impacted by drugs.  My half sister is only 15 but her mother did cocaine when she was pregnant with her.  As a result she was born with a congenitial heart defect and has had 6 major heart surgeries in her short life.  She has died on the table 3 times leaving her with brain damage.  She will essentially be 6 yrs old her whole life.

My step-son is also suffering right now because his mother has chosen drugs over him.  She will call him and promise him the moon and then we have to pick up the pieces when she doesn't deliver.  She was supposed to get him for the summer.....called him and told him, yea son I will have your plane ticket ready as soon as you get out of school.  Well now she won't even call him or answer when he calls her.  She is avoiding him, and he is sooo hopeful.
Everyday he says "ell I will probably be gone tomorrow next week, I won't be here much longer".  What am I supposed to tell the kid?  I just agree with him and assure him his mom will call him soon.

I am sorry, I know I am spilling my guts here but it just aggrivates me!!!  Sometimes it is good to just gripe and let it all out, even if it is to total strangers!!! LOL!

I know what you mean about spilling your guts to 'strangers'. But I feel like 20PM is my lil support group, persay. I value the opinions of most on here. And even if we don't know know each other, we know each other. Does that make sense?

It's truly sad to hear about your half sister, but it is THIS info that needs to be shared with all the children out there that are experiencing the peer pressure of drugs. They need to know and SEE what happens to people that uses drugs, and see what happens to the people around them, how it affects everyone.

Your step-son totally needs his dad's and your support! Bless his heart, sadly...his mom will burn her own bridge in time. But it is you and his dad that will be there for him, and in years to come, he will see that...and will be very thankful that you two were there for him. All you can do is to help him continue to build his self-esteem and assure him that it isn't HIM. That HE isn't the cause of his mom not coming to see him or calling him. So sad. Kudos to you for caring for him. Some step-parents could careless. More adults need to step up to the plate and be good role models for their kids, be it biological, step or whatever.